Social Services consistently fail parents who have disrupted

The message received loud and clear from parents who have contacted me via this website is that Social Services neglect, abandon, disown parents who have disrupted or wish to disrupt.  Every single parent who has emailed me reports the exact same experience.  This is a shocking FACT.   Why do the SS fail parents at a time when support should not be greater? That is the bigger question – something to do with statistics? having to admit failure/poor representation of the child to start with – inadequate services/ poorly educated staff?  Social Services distance themselves from parents almost immediately a disruption is on the cards and offer zero support; and instead go on the defensive, close rank and make sure that the parent accepts all the blame for the disruption.  Authorities accept NO blame or failure in the adoption breakdown.  The question we need to ask ourselves is what is wrong with Social Services and how a Dickensian organisation like this can purport to be on the side of children’s best interests?  Woe betide you ever fall short as a parent and end up the wrong side of the fence…. Parents who have experienced the tragedy of disruption are further traumatised by SS attitudes, the adoption disruption meetings and the Care Orders and are further more bamboozled by the Local authorities appalling internal formal complaints procedure, yet again designed to protect all those within the SS for their own internal miserable failures.  Don’t forget your human rights ‘No one shall be subject to attacks upon his honour and reputation.  Everyone has the right to protection of the law against such interference or attacks’ Declaration of Human Rights Article 12.  Feel free to quote and repeat this next time SS blames you for the disruption in its entirety.  As parents who have been through an adoption disruption trauma we need to collectively report our experiences and stand up and be counted without cowering in the shadow of fear.   The LA’s shambolic internal formal complaints procedure has left us as parents with one other powerful option  – go to your local MP, media, radio stations, and national papers.  The SS have left parents with no other choices as they consistently defend the indefensible, have no hesitation to misreport facts, and will have you as the parent cast aside as the pariah and accept no blame or part in any of the breakdown.    Your voice does count.  Make it count.

3 thoughts on “Social Services consistently fail parents who have disrupted

  1. Alison says:

    I can relate to this fully, as I approach a disruption meeting in 2 weeks time that I have battled to get for 8 months, without any instigation from either authority, the errors are endless. Is there an appropriate forum where we can air views?


    • ABC says:

      Hi Alison
      As far as I am aware there is no platform/forum for parents to voice their concerns regarding local authorities and social services hence why being outspoken in the media and telling your local MP and tweeting/fb and responding on this site is beneficial in spreading the word so that the secrecy shrouding social services can be best exposed to all in the UK. Once exposed social workers who operate in this horrific manner, poor quality social services, lack of support and deliberate deceptions/manipulations of facts and maladministration can be thoroughly examined. There are judges such as Judge Munby who is a great advocate of exposing social services especially in family courts. Many UK judges know exactly what is going on but are powerless to do anything unless we as the parent fight back and force local authorities to back down on putting forth damning reports about the parents who have disrupted. It is a nonsense and needs to be stopped. Political exposure is the way forward ultimately.


      • Alison says:

        Thank you, believe you me, I have written numerous letters to try and appropriately expose poor practice, it’s a real battle though, it really is. I am interested in your comments about human rights, in terms of trying to adopt again. I cannot think it is acceptable that you are penalised for the rest of your days, because one placement was not right. LA insist they are transparent, nothing could be further from the truth. They are not always honest with each other either, and there is a definite theme of covering up, rather than really getting to grips with why a placement disrupts and learning from it.


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